Thursday, August 27, 2015

Perspective

I didn't do anything wrong 
I didn't do anything wrong
I'm an innocent victim
I'm an innocent victim
I didn't know she'd believe me
I didn't know he'd lie to me
It didn't mean anything
It meant the world 
She'll be okay
I'm not okay
She's tough
I'm broken
I didn't do anything wrong
I did everything wrong 

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Passing Years; Stagnant Time

Stay here he said
And I did
Good little girl 
Content to watch clouds
Rewarded with chocolates
And hair ribbons for my patience
Stay here he said 
And I did
Curled up on the porch swing
Watching his truck pull away
Already counting my numbers
To pass the time
Until he came back
My world, my love 
Until I counted higher than ever before
Day into
Night into
Day into
Night
Again and again
But I stayed 
Because he asked me to
And there was no where else to go 

Monday, August 24, 2015

The Lilith Altar

Beg
Pitiful thing
I'll pretend you are
What you once were
You forgot you were worthless
I'll remind you 
Plead
Pathetic thing
I'll make you believe
You need me
You thought you were strong
I'll make you feed on the lies
You told her as if I created them first
I will cage you
I will beat you
I will crush you
I will watch you shatter 
And you will say my name 
Every time you die 

Friday, August 21, 2015

The Broken Girl and The Clever Boy - White





                “Hi. I don’t believe we’ve met. My name is Tom, and I’m madly in love with you.”

                The message flashed across the blank White of the screen.

                Six years. Six years that flew in a heartbeat. She wished on every wishing star and four leaf clover to be noticed. And if she had to be honest with herself, she loved him for the last two of those six years. He was funny, charming, clever, and incredibly pretty. Unsure about making such an irrational confession, she chose to watch and to dream. Every day she would make her social media rounds hoping he’d posted a joke or funny story about gaming. Some days she was rewarded with the slightly crooked smile of an avatar while chatting with friends. Some days her heart would gallop when she got a Guild log-in notification.

                So here she sat facing a computer screen that made her cover her mouth with her hand. Unable to breathe and on the verge of tears, she sat dumfounded. The harsh White backdrop contrasted sharply against the black letters. There it was. Everything she ever wanted.

                And she had no idea what to do next.

                FIFTEEN SECONDS AGO…………

                This time he would hit send. He swore it. He’d seen her struggle each time she was told she was fat or ugly or dumb. He’d watched the fa├žade of self-esteem break behind the scenes. She was plenty strong on the surface and had nearly everyone fooled. But he knew for years about the fragileness that she kept from the world. He’d seen it in heartbreaking posts she was convinced no one saw.

                It devastated him.

                He had no idea how she felt about him, but he knew she deserved better.

                She deserved to know how he felt.

                He took a deep breath and stared at the blank White typing field.

                And once again Tom started to type. “Hi. I don’t believe we’ve met………”

Thursday, August 20, 2015

They Would Whisper

I was beautiful once
Loved and cared for
I was majestic and splendid
People would walk by
And stop to admire
They would whisper 
Between themsleves
I wonder who lives here
I wish she was mine
I'd give anything to own her 
But I was empty
And left to rot and fade
People would walk by
But they stopped admiring
They would whisper 
Between themselves 
I wonder who abandon her
I wish someone would fix her
She needs a lot of work and time 
And rain fell
And sun beat
And time took its toll
And people would walk by
They would whisper
Between themsleves 
How disgusting
What an eyesore
I don't know how she's even standing
I would tear her down 
I heard them all 
I believed them
And I prayed for my destruction
Since no one knew my story

Claimed

"As it pleases You,"
Said the subservient heart.
And Death kissed her mouth. 

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Coax

There's a flower
Tucked away
A little sun
A little rain
And he'll lean in
Unfold, open, and worship 
At the alter of you 

Athazagoraphobia

I turned my back
She never once begged
Just let tears roll down her cheeks
Stifled sobs concealed by
The back of her hand
My chin held high
I walked through the metal door and 
Let it slam behind me 
For effect 
But then
My eyes adjusted
And I saw that I had entered 
The cell intended for her
Her weeping
Shifted to
A deep rumble in her chest
I looked in my pockets
For a key 
And found them empty
The chuckles now laughter
I turned back to look through
The tiny window
Laughter now hysterics
As she tapped the iron
Against the glass
There was no more love
In her control
Her mocking laughter 
Turned to faded screeches
As she left me behind
And I thought myself alone
Until I heard the tiny voice
Echo from a corner
Of my new home 
"I always knew you'd find me."

Monday, August 17, 2015

Down and Away

There are cuts that fade
And cuts that scar
And cuts that never heal
A spinning pinwheel
Full of blades
Reminds her that it's real  
It's more than just
A broken wing
A crack that's quick to mend
The wing was wrenched
From angel's back
With pain that doesn't end 
No chance of hope
It's wasted tears
That lead her to this city
And one-winged angels
Take no solace
No mercy and no pity
So carry on 
You ugly thing
Even Hell won't have you now
And wander lands
Till end of time
His lies a broken vow
And pay the price
For all his sins
Since this is what you are
The perfect servant
Ever faithful 
Blinded by a star 



puzzleBox

Damp and moldy box
It shouldn't have been opened 
Strong emotion
Tucked away
Rest easy Little One
Actions that broke
Can 
Take time to repack but
It's worthless 
Opening the box again 
Now that it's been resealed 
Seems a dream 

Saturday, August 15, 2015

oldWars

A lightning crack
The sky torn in two
The angel and the demon
War across the sky
The angel knowing 
The demon feeling
And human spirit is the victim

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

doubleBladed

A fraction of a hair
Too far
Bloody thigh
Each heartbeat
A tiny fountain
To entertain me
I don't want it to stop 
No one could save me 

Monday, August 10, 2015

Little

It's an ugly place
Amongst the weeds
Void of light 
And full of decay
To be so small that 
Dandelion becomes sequoia 
And dirt becomes mountains
And the tears of mice 
Will drown you 
All I can do is
Look up
And dream 
Of being found 

Sunday, August 9, 2015

thermoDynamic

Matter is neither
Created nor destroyed
There is no such law
Regarding emotion
Thoughtless words
Careless actions
And a boy who believed
Is made a fool 

Saturday, August 8, 2015

hauntedHouse

Maybe someday soon
I'll be able to forget 
You. Just not today. 

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Submarine

There is a voice
Unable to speak 
Broken from drinking acid
Chemically silenced
From speaking 
Weeping eyes carved out
And crushed 
Beneath a heavy boot
So no one can read their unspoken plea
Hands and feet left bound 
Tethered to an abandoned leash 
The tin can 
Set adrift
The rusted cage
Locked 
The key
Destroyed
All the measures taken to prevent 
A rescue 
Were unnecessary 
Since no one knew she was 
There 

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Coda

"Always keep fighting." 
They don't realize no one 
cares about my war.

Monday, August 3, 2015

redWaters

One last gasp 
And one last surrender 
Weighted ankles
Peeled wrists 
And a rope to hang 
The human fountain 

Sunday, August 2, 2015

The Shattering

The rain won't stop
It lessens or increases
But the sky never stops leaking
A symphony of angels' tears
A weeping chorus
Celestial beings mourn
A thousand broken pieces 
That used to be one soul